CHRIS LIVE AKA SHAKER SAYS: Be careful NOT to misread the title of this song. Contrary to what many might be lead to believe given Wiz Khalifa's penchant for simptastic overtures of L.O.V.E. delivered at the foot of Amber "Svedka Robot Girl" Rose's platinum plated stripper pole to Heaven, the Taylor Gang chieftan's motto is indeed "Work Hard, Play Hard" and NOT "Work Hard, PLAY YOURSELF Hard". There is a difference. Please make a note of it.
The REAL "Lamestream Media" (NOTE:Yeah, fuck Y.O.U. Sarah Palin! I took your cretinous catchphrase and flipped it. Y.O.U. made it a hot Fox News soundbyte ... I made it a hot addition to my post ... lol.) tried to Taylor Swift-boat this young man's livelyhood after he bumrushed the stage of the 2009 MTV Video Music Awards show, but with endearing real nigga waiting-on-my-latenight-slide lines like, "I left the door cracked open ... New ... New York City is dangerous! I could've been robbed!", the hood has no choice but to ride for Chi-Town's Finest! Message To Newport™ 100's Chain-Smoking Svedka Robot Girl AKA Ms. Amber Rose: Are Y.O.U. listening to this baby? Good shit!
CHRIS LIVE AKA SHAKER SAYS:Sooooooooooooooooooooo, apparently a few days ago @ the Philadelphia stop of the "Watch The Throne" tour, Kanye West got wrapped ALL up in the complimentary emotional Snuggie® afforded valorized visitors to the "City Of Brotherly Love" and was so moved that he dedicated his hit "Runaway" to his former flame, one Ms. Amber Rose.
Without mentioning everybody's favorite Newport™ 100's menthol flavored nymph by name, Kanye West said, and I quote, "To the city of Philly, I want to thank y'all for making the incredible person that this song was made for". SMH. Message To Kanye West: Dog, it's over. Wiz Khalifa dry cleaned, starched AND ironed his "Black and Yellow" cape, swooped in for the kill on this broad and, believe it or not, Y.O.U. should count your lucky stars that he did!
Anyway, thanks to the internet firestorm that Mr. West, Mr. West's public "apology" caused, a gracious Svedka Robot Girl - clad in 1 of her many Patti LaBelle post cataract surgery recovery sized pairs of ballerific sunnies - sat down with XXL and chopped it up about her ex and his recent Hallmark® licensed overture @ his show. Fuck it!
CHRIS LIVE AKA SHAKER SAYS:Smh. If I've told Y.O.U. once, I've told Y.O.U. a thousand times: The overwhelming majority of today's emo Hipster elite - a perverse cadre of soft-minded yet frighteningly influential pseudo-celebrities and entertainers - are actually members of an invasive species of blood sucking cybernetic organisms sent from the planet Trendoid to feast upon the collective integrity of ALL Earthlings and to specifically eviscerate the spines of men! Heed my warning! We live in a time of mass extinction and can nary afford to continue to casually ignore the DayGlo® signs of doom brashly blinking in our face every day. And this is precisely why a nigga like Wiz Khalifa, his blonde streak and now his "I-just-ate-Amber-Rose's-Newport™-100's-menthol-flavored-coochie-box" breath need to get alllllllllllllllllllllll the way the fuck outta here! Dog, like why would Y.O.U. feel the need to do this on stage? Like ... nevermind. There's no amount of reasoning that can combat this level of lameness. Chill.
CHRIS LIVE AKA SHAKER SAYS:Sooooooooooooo, yeah, a few days ago Vibe Magazine released the cover of their upcoming June/July 2011"Sexy" Issue. Great. Oh, but there was 1 problem. The 1st cover featured a topless Rick Ross tatted to the max and bathing in black diamonds - particularly sporting an unGODly amount of Jesus Pieces that ALL strangely resemble Isaac Hayes as "Black Moses" moonlighting as Black Jesus ... lol. Niggas aint want to see all that. (NOTE: And, for the record, no this is NOT a case of weight discrimination. Unless otherwise posted by my little sister, the currently M.I.A. Aisha, Livestyle has a strict policy against entries dedicated to naked dudes. Nope. Not in my house!)
Thankfully, as it turns out this is a double cover issue and today saw the release of the 2nd marquee featuring everybody's favorite sexxxy ass Newport™ 100's chain-smoking Svedka Robot Girl AKA Ms. Amber Rose. But, hold up though! If the innocent citizenry of America are going to be exposed to the "Bawse"'s boobs when this hits newsstands in a matter of weeks, why come Amber Rose couldn't let her good girls breathe? No arm bra, no nothing? SMH. Whatevs. Her 15 minutes of fame is almost up ... the sex tape soon come ... lol. Holla @ ya boy in BK!
CHRIS LIVE AKA SHAKER SAYS:Listen, I never wanted Elise Neal to be a smeez. I mean, she looks nice enough and, judging from her interviews and various public appearances, she carries herself equally as classy. That having been said, she goes from 50 Cent - albeit years apart - to Rick Ross!? Really? At this stage of the game Elise Neal is supposed to be a well established B-List celebrity in her own right ... leaving the realm of dating 2nd tier rappers and forced photo-ops to Amber Rose AKA the Svedka Robot Girl and lesser known groupies in dire need of a come up! Smh. She's still a b-a-d itchbay, but the mileage is clearly showing on shorty. It is what it is. Hey, I aint mad @ my nigga Señor Rozay ... he's doing it up like a G is supposed to! "BAAAAAAAAAAWSE!"
CHRIS LIVE AKA SHAKER SAYS:"F-50 AKA Ferrari ... F-50 AKA 50 Cent". And, back in 2002, with that preamble one 50 Cent took his relentless mixtape massacre to the world with his opening mainstream salvo, "Wanksta". The kid from Southside, Queens hitched his wagon full of diss records and catchy, often sing-songy hooks to a comet called stardom and rode that meteorite to the top of the charts. fast forward to 2011 though and the once mighty G-Unit general has seen the expanse of his empire and his influence greatly depleted. The silver striped fur upon the back of this self-proclaimed "gorilla" has indeed dulled. Time marches on.
Nevertheless, not the type to go out without a fight, 50 Cent gets his hands dirty and re-ups on his tried and true formula of pointed barbs and witty bars over soulful samples for this "Old 2003 Ferrari" record - clearly an attempt to tap back into his heyday of the early aughts.
See, this is exactly what I've been saying: When all else fails (NOTE: And in Curtis Jackson's case, musically speaking, it has ALL been failing as of late) just go back to making good music. No more, no less. "We can share love like Kanye and Khalifa/From runways in Milan to big bags of reefer/She alright for a night but don’t keep her ... ask Nas, Kelis was the illest Ether" Whaaaaaaaaaat!? Stop playing shun! Message To 50 Cent: Ayo Boo-Boo! This "Old 2003 Ferrari" joint is what the fuck I'm talking 'bout! Welcome back.
CHRIS LIVE AKA SHAKER SAYS:Yup, Wiz Khalifa has gone all "method actor" on us and gone the extra mile by putting a blonde streak in his hair ala Kwamé circa 1989. Clearly Amber Rose has her fangs deep in his soul now and is sucking out his life force in a questionable transfusion of coolness. Smh. Really, what is it about bad lightskin itchbays from Philly? These femme fatales are serious my nigga. Let's talk about this.
Per the exclusive Livestyle user agreement by which, through quid pro quo I enrich your lives in return for your patronage and undying gratitude, after mentioning Kwamé in the main body of this post, it is incumbent upon me to elaborate upon this man a bit.
Once the toast of the town, the "Boy Genius" born Kwamé Holland was doing his thing back when House music and much of Hip Hop shared a curious bond that saw a lot more men and women than they would probably like to admit today wearing Zodiac shoes, balloon pants and both polka-dot printed silk shirts AND blonde streaks in their hightop fades. The last of the 2 aforementioned trends have Kwamé's tiny fingerprints all over them, for better and worse. Don't get it twisted though, the man responsible for such hits as "The Man We All Know And Love" and "The Rhythm" was all the way Hip Hop and über early on the live band accompaniment tip.
The homie had a good run, but, around 1994, as rap music heads traded in the suave bola look for rugged Carhartt suits and Timbs, shit hit the fan for artists like Kwamé. In fact, his life was all but a wrap once, the man who would be king, the late, great Biggie Smalls proclaimed that, "Your life is played out like Kwamé and those fuckin' polka-dots ...". Dammit man! Bye bye rap career Mr. Holland. Sure Kwamé tried to diss Biggie back, but, come on ... Y.O.U. already know that didn't go too well for shun.
Fast forward to the early 2000's and, thankfully, Kwamé - with all of his innate musical talents - was able to reinvent himself as a hit making producer even crafting Lloyd Banks's debut single "We On Fire" from his 1st album. Salute this oft ridiculed and forgotten Hip Hop innovator. The kid stays in the picture.
CHRIS LIVE AKA SHAKER SAYS:FACT:Wiz Khalifa never has to record another song again in his tatted up life! Why? Because EVERY pro sports team in the "Steel City" AKA "Shitsburgh" (NOTE: Don't blame me, the natives themselves use it as their very own collectively self-deprecating term of endearment for their beloved hometown. True story) wears the colors "Black And Yellow"! That's right! This marijuana loving and this week's Amber Rose AKA the Svedka Vodka robot girl banging rapper is a marketing dynamo! Mr. Khalifa's buzz will undoubtedly fade quickly, but, don't trip as he is set to get paid major royalties in perpetuity as long as ALL the sports franchises in Pittsburgh, PA get suited up like they're straight out of a beehive ... lol.
Anyway, last night Wiz Khalifa hit the stage @ Heinz Field to serenade his beloved Pittsburgh Steelers and a sold out stadium full of fans. The crowd took a little while to warm up to this new fangled rap music anthem, but once them "Terrible Towels" got waving it was all L.O.V.E. Shiiiiiiiiit, they'd better get used to "Black And Yellow" ... this record aint going nowhere b. Good shit!
CHRIS LIVE AKA SHAKER SAYS: Big Snoop D-Oh-Double-G and his favorite nephew and Amber Rose's current boy toy of the week, Wiz Khalifa, play a spirited round of "take 2 and pass" in this video for "That Good". Welcome to "High School" orientation. Good shit!
CHRIS LIVE AKA SHAKER SAYS: Despite being none too smitten with the lazy concept for this video that casts Fabolous as some kind of 1950's style smoky Jazz lounge crooner/spy agency director (?), this visual DOES have 1 saving grace: Amber Rose. That's right, the Svedka Vodka robot girl is looking mighty "NIIIIIIIIIICE!" in this otherwise comically corny clip. Yes, Kanye West's ex is certainly 1 fantastically filthy Philly born and bred potty mouthed and pouty lipped bad itchbay my nigga! I can dig it ... and, maybe, even Y.O.U. can too ... lol. Holla @ ya boy in BK!
CHRIS LIVE AKA SHAKER SAYS: Whereas words alone cannot begin to describe the sheer joy that I feel now knowing that Kobe Bryant's attendance @ the studio session for this "Power (Remix)" did not result in what would have undoubtedly been an awkward and stupid feature from #24, I was kind of looking forward to a verse from Mos Def and more than just a signature "It's SHOWTIME!" adlib or 2 from Swizz Beatz. Jay-Z is actually on this joint ... I didn't see that coming a mile away. No, really, I didn't ... lol.
Anyway, while Mr. West Mr. West's flipping of the Chill Rob GHip Hop/House classic "I've Got The Power" is completely apropos given this song's title AND is yet another superlative example of Kanye's expansive musical vocabulary, I think that this record is just OK. Nothing torturously terrible here and nothing mind blowing special here either. Apparently though, I am in the minority ... lol.
Some have already hopped the hyperbole train and crowned this achievement the "best song of the year". Really? So, we're just gonna act like "B.M.F." didn't happen? No "Popular Demand"? I mean, I don't even fuck with Jay "Diarrhea Of The Mouth" Electronica like that, but we're not gonna talk about "The Ghost Of Christopher Wallace" yall? Word? Today's Hip Hop fans sure have a short attention span. Whatever. This remix is cool ... and I'ma leave it @ that. Holla @ ya boy in BK!
(EDITOR'S NOTE: Aight, upon further review, Amber Rose's former meal ticket DID go in crazy on the last verse ... lol. Real recognize real.)
BONUS:
(QUESTION: Is that the beautiful N'Bushe Wright "singing" the hook in this video? I want answers and I want them NOW ... or @ least as soon as 1 of Y.O.U. figures this out ... lol.) Uno.
(NOTE: In the interest of maintaining some modicum of brevity and not going on for another 5 paragraphs, I couldn't possibly get into the subject of the group Mantronix and their importance to modern music. I could however include their "King Of Beats" record that Snap! sampled in order to create their copy-and-paste crapsterpiece ... lol. Enjoy!) Dos.
In accordance with the dictates of the Livestyle School Of Continuing Education with specific attention paid to Livestyle Executive Order1988-92, it is my unique moral obligation to cite, explain and, when technologically capable, produce images, audio and/or visuals that relevantly correlate to any aspect of the main post. Today's great revelation comes to us via Jersey City, NJ's very own Chill Rob G ... let us press play ... lol.
The history regarding this song can be a little bit confusing: Basically, Chill Rob G's vocals from his song "Let The Words Flow" were sampled (NOTE: More like copy and pasted almost the ENTIRE SONG under the unsolicited and illegal guise of a "remix") by some German Euro-trash producers for their Pop-Dance crew Snap! and "The Power" was born. Score 1 for the Krauts! LOL.
Realizing that they had an international hit on their hands that they were not seeing a penny on, Chill Rob G's label sued and put a cease and desist motherfucker order on Snap! Attempting to capitalize off this momentum Chill Rob G recorded a different version for his debut "Ride the Rhythm", but his core fan base wasn't checking for it - it was a lose, lose situation for the homie. I remember clearly being like 9 or 10 years old and hating this record after approximately 2.5 listens - I wanted to hear shit like "Court Is Now In Session", not this reheated "Hammer Pants" dance party crap.
In an era of Milli-Vanilli, where a slim Zelma Davis could serve as the face to the amazing Martha Wash's voice simply because she was deemed too fat for MTV, Chill Rob G stands as Hip Hop's forgotten victim of late 1980's/very early 1990's lip-synching music piracy. Son doesn't get anywhere near the amount of props that he deserves. Salute this man!
Fast forward to 2010 and Mr. West, Mr. West is on a refreshingly innovative creative tear the likes of which Hip Hop music has not seen in too damn long! So what if Amber Rose aint there to put the Hennessey charged battery in his back anymore ... he clearly has learned his lesson ... lol. Trust me yall, "Good Ass Job" is gonna be 1 good ass album!
CHRIS LIVE AKA SHAKER SAYS:Yup, it's official: Nicki Minaj has made the Gummy Bears magic berry juice "bounce" from the occasionally awkwardly lumpy butt pads to full-on Angel Lola Luv endorsed Hydrogel ass shots! This AINT your momma's Mattel® manufactured Barbie® doll!
I'm the last money in and I'm the 1st money out in any situation. I am a Brooklyn born and bred MC with a keen sense of self and I appreciate forward thinking with regard to any endeavor. I am NOT your average rapper. I'm a hood socialite. The following will give you true insight to me as a man, my music and my unique LIVESTYLE. I does this for real homie!
The world is filled with blogs AND hoes, I'll just talk about those I know.
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